Rivers of Life

Sometimes I just don’t feel like it anymore.

Sometimes I just don’t feel like ‘rivers of living water will flow from me”.

Sometimes, I just feel like I’m being overwhelmed by the river flowing over me…

and I even want to give up.

and then?  There are times when I read something like yesterday’s devotion and get reminded that there WILL BE those times.  I will come across those obstacles.  I will run into those trying times.

A river is victoriously persistent, overcoming all barriers.

Stay Focused on the Source.

In you, God has developed rushing rivers for others.

“Get back in the game, Amanda.  This is only a barrier.  An obstacle that you, too… can overcome.  Just stay true to the Source of your river, and you, too will be a blessing upon those around you.” 

The Far-Reaching Rivers of Life

Sep

06

2012

He who believes in Me . . . out of his heart will flow rivers of living water —John 7:38

A river reaches places which its source never knows. And Jesus said that, if we have received His fullness, “rivers of living water” will flow out of us, reaching in blessing even “to the end of the earth” (Acts 1:8) regardless of how small the visible effects of our lives may appear to be. We have nothing to do with the outflow— “This is the work of God, that you believe. . .” (John 6:29). God rarely allows a person to see how great a blessing he is to others.

A river is victoriously persistent, overcoming all barriers. For a while it goes steadily on its course, but then comes to an obstacle. And for a while it is blocked, yet it soon makes a pathway around the obstacle. Or a river will drop out of sight for miles, only later to emerge again even broader and greater than ever. Do you see God using the lives of others, but an obstacle has come into your life and you do not seem to be of any use to God? Then keep paying attention to the Source, and God will either take you around the obstacle or remove it. The river of the Spirit of God overcomes all obstacles. Never focus your eyes on the obstacle or the difficulty. The obstacle will be a matter of total indifference to the river that will flow steadily through you if you will simply remember to stay focused on the Source. Never allow anything to come between you and Jesus Christ— not emotion nor experience— nothing must keep you from the one great sovereign Source.

Think of the healing and far-reaching rivers developing and nourishing themselves in our souls! God has been opening up wonderful truths to our minds, and every point He has opened up is another indication of the wider power of the river that He will flow through us. If you believe in Jesus, you will find that God has developed and nourished in you mighty, rushing rivers of blessing for others.

(My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers)

Almost There

I made a conscious decision to run a marathon.  I am in full mental stability, so there’s no excuse.  And in doing so, I decided:

I’m running this marathon to be uncomfortable.

I’m running this marathon for others to learn about the Orphan crisis.

I’m running this marathon to share their story.

Each day is a new day.  Each day a different challenge.  Today, fighting off the effects of Hurricane Isaac’s humidity, I literally felt like I was swimming my short 4 miler today.  Tomorrow?  I take on the massive 18 miler.

And not to sound ‘un-encouraging,’ I don’t care what anyone says.  Waking up at 5am and running ANY mileage does NOT get any easier.

But.

I’ve definitely become immune to it.

Now, it’s just my routine. That’s what I do.  It’s who I am right now.  It is my lifestyle.

And tomorrow? I’ll wake up and do it again.

And for the next 5 weeks, I know that the road is only going to get longer and tougher, but I have this overwhelming sense of peace that I can face it.  That I can take it on.

I listen to my body now and what it needs.  When it feels like its hurting, it probably is.  When it feels like its hungry, it probably is.  When it feels thirsty, yeah… I’m probably thirsty.

You see… I decided to run this race because I “needed” something more.  And it’s given me just that.

I decided to dedicate this run to the hundreds of faces I’ve met.  The hundreds of hugs I’ve given.  The kisses I’ve received and the smiles that melted my heart.  I dedicated this race for THEM and in doing so… I’ve gotten so much more.

I’m able to share their stories.  Running alongside my training partners, I get to tell their dreams.  And like my early morning training runs that don’t seem to get any easier, these orphans live a life full of despair and desperation~that doesn’t seem to get any easier for them.

But they wake up each day, with a bright new attitude that they can face it.  That they can take it on.

Because, they too have found their source when they’re in pain.  Their source when they’re hungry.  Their source when they’re thirsty:

I’m not running this marathon to compare my hardships to theirs.  I live a very amazing and blessed, comfortable and satisfying life.

I’m running this marathon to be uncomfortable.

I’m running this marathon for others to learn about the Orphan crisis.

I’m running this marathon to share their story.

And I still need your help to do so.

If you feel like you’ve been touched, in any way, by the power of what Visiting Orphans does around the world, I would love for your donations for this cause.

I can’t run this race alone.

I don’t have far to go, and I’m asking for your help in getting me to the finish line…

FOLLOW THIS LINK TO DONATE TODAY:  https://www.visitingorphans.org/cgi-bin/donate.cgi
Fund Category:  CHICAGO MARATHON
Team Member:  AMANDA HERDINA

And… Thank you.

For Jovia.  For Norine.  For Lillian, Amanda, Benita, Grace, Baby Valentine, Nancy, Angel, Denize, Noella and everyone that’s touched my heart.  Thank you,

Go ahead, Eat your cake too.

I love reading my blog from my birthday last year.  And just where I was mentally, emotionally, spiritually…. and where I am today.  People asked me (really, they did ! ), “Soooo, you feel any older?”

And realizing they truly meant it in a sincere fashion, I reply.  “Actually.  No !   I feel like I’m getting younger !   It’s like I’m going backwards…”

And it’s the truth.

Each year I look back at my life bucket list and ponder over it.  The things I put on this list like 12 years ago seemed so far-fetched.  Almost like I dreamed it, but couldn’t believe it… Never reaaaaaally thought I’d ever do any of it.  As the years have gone by, and in my 'aging maturity’ (insert wink and belly laugh), my attitude has completely changed:

  

~Why NOT accomplish all that you’ve set out to do?  

~Why NOT dream big…and then actually go after your dreams?

~Why see it, if you don’t want to achieve it?

Basically, what I’m trying to get at is:

Why have your cake… if you can’t eat it too.

And now… my dreams have never seemed so reachable.  Sure, I’ve let go of some things that don’t seem worthwhile anymore and gained other things I’d rather do more.  And it seems like with each year that goes by, the more realistic I feel about each dream.  Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned in my life…. the Lord really DOES give you the desires of your heart, so just be careful what you wish for if you’re at all scared of them coming true…...

CHAMPAGNE WISHES AND NOT-SO-CAVIAR DREAMS

1.  Swim with the Dolphins (and not at Sea World)

2.  See Garth Brooks & Martina McBride in concert (and doesn’t even have to be together)

3.  Move to California

4.  Camp in the mountains

5.  Hot Air Balloon in Italy

6.  Horseback ride at Sunset

7.  Run a marathon

8.  Take a roadtrip in a Vintage Chevy Bel Air Convertible

9.  Find my cause & Get my own 501c3

10.  Go to Africa

11.  Meet June Carter & Johnny Cash

12.  Have a forever Valentine

13.  Ride a train through the Alps

14.  White Water Raft

15.  Learn Guitar

16.  Hike to the highest point of a mountain

17.  50 yard line, 3 rows up at a Patriot’s Game

18.  Write & publish a vintage coffee table photo book

19.  Hear a true life story from a Native American legend

20.  See a sunrise over the ocean

21.  Ride a helicopter

22.  Read the Bible beginning to end

23.  Sky Dive

24.  Be in a Musical (and no, High School does not count)

25.  Get a tattoo

And so there ya have it.  We’ll see what changes in this year to come… It’s always interesting, always an adventure.

I’d like to leave ya’ll with a few ‘aging’ quotes that helped make this year more bearable… ;)

Good things happen to those that wait.

Things get better with age.

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young.

As I grow older, I pay less attention to what men say. I just watch what they do.

Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone.

and two of my all time faves from some peeps near and dear to my heart… my Gramaw Betty and Grampawpaw Chuck:

“What?  These wrinkles?  I like to think of these wrinkles as laugh lines.  It means you were very happy in your life, my dear.  Laugh lines.  Not wrinkles.”  ~Grandma

"We hope you are having a great adventure today and all week.  As you know you are not getting any younger, so celebrate while you can!”  ~Grandpa

Why Run?

Such a sweet post from my friend Jackie Chapman!  (She does a much better job at paraphrasing what I’m doing than me…I babble.  She gets to the point)….  Thanks Jackie for sharing…

“Why am I Running?"

My Friend Amanda Is Jumping…

Posted on August 13, 2012 by Jackie A. Chapman

My friend Amanda will be running the Chicago Marathon in October. And while that is a big goal in and of itself, she is also raising $9,000 for Visiting Orphans, an organization very near to her heart. This is a big jump for her: to make this run and to make this goal.

In her words… “On October 7th, I have committed to running 26.2 miles in Chicago for all the little kiddos, all the faces I have seen, and the smiles I have absorbed. I have committed to running this marathon for THEM. I promised that while training, while running, during the race that I would share their story. I’m running this race as an incentive to raise the money, to spread the awareness, and to share their cause. And I’m asking for your help in supporting me.

“This is for Jovia. And Lillian. Norine, Denize, Noella, and Baby Valentine. This is for the orphans who are no longer just a statistic, but a face. A name.”

By way of information, Visiting Orphans is a non-profit organization that conducts missions trips for churches, schools, and individuals from across the country to orphanages in China, Ethiopia, Rwanda, Uganda, Ghana, Kenya, Ecuador, Ukraine, Haiti, El Salvador, Honduras, India and Costa Rica. They work to fulfill the biblical mandate given in James 1:27 of “visiting orphans” in their distress. You can read more at visitingorphans.org.

I made my donation and I hope that you will also help Amanda reach her goal.

HOW TO DONATE ONLINE:
Visit:  https://www.visitingorphans.org/cgi-bin/donate.cgi
Fund Category: Chicago Marathon
Specify Team Member: Amanda Herdina

HOW TO DONATE BY MAIL:
Checks Payable to VISITING ORPHANS
449 Metroplex Drive
Nashville, TN 37211
Specify Amanda Herdina/Chicago/Rawanda in the memo line

Jackie has such an awesome story, so the fact she took the time to post and repost this means the world to me!  Once a music industry guru, she has made the brave decision to jump into full time ministry and is now working with Global Initiative.  Read more about Jackie’s adventure at HER BLOG at http://jaqchapman.com

I DO get to visit orphans, telling them how important they are.  That they have a purpose, a destiny.  That they have been forgiven, or that they have a place in this world.  I get to love on them.  And when it’s said and done, it’s probably more therapy to me than them.  And my heart beats.

Because of this, I wanted to DO something I love FOR something I love.  I’m running this marathon for THEM.  When I cross that finish line, I want to remember that I’m running for a Cause.  There are 163 million orphans in the world.  I’m running for THEM…

Run with me?  I’d love for your help in also sharing this blog.  Posting it. Reposting it.  Tweeting it… Help me get to my finish line???

Amanda

RUNNING 4 ORPHANS

Still Running… Foot to Pavement, ’Soul’ to Earth

People say I’m crazy.  Since I was little, “Yeah…that Amanda…she’s crazy.”

I get it from everyone.  Friends.  Family.  Family friends.  People who know me and people who don’t.

And ya know? 

I’m okay with it.

“Well-Behaved Women Seldom Make History”

And, it’s not so much that I’m not behaving… I just like to do things differently.

Why NOT run a marathon to raise awareness and funds for my little butternugs in Africa?

Why NOT go right back to Rwanda after I just got back?

Why NOT devote my time, my energy, my Friday nights and Saturdays, weekday mornings and ‘what not’ to training my life away to cross a finish line 26.2 miles away so I can devote my time, my energy and every piece of my heart to children thousands of miles away?

Pounding foot to pavement.

‘Sole’ to Earth.

You see, when I do things… yeah, I’m a bit of a dreamer.  I like to do things Big.

You see, I was never a runner.  I never wanted to just ‘run’ as a hobby.  

And then I signed up, and finished, two half marathons.   As I’ve seen myself do with things in life, after I finished that first 1/2 marathon in San Diego in 2004-- I said, “There.  I’m done.  That was insane, tough, brutal, and ... hard.  And I don’t EVER want to do it again.”  And I was finished.  I had my heart set on quitting the running world....

And as life has it, the road between then and today was the bumpiest, curviest, most challenging journey I’ve faced.  And almost 7 years later, I felt the emptiness creep inside as my heart tugged towards the pavement.  I was to be out on those early morning training days, and I knew it, but thought I would never be there again.  The training was hard, but I was at such a low place in my life that running was like therapy to me.  It got me through some pretty muddy water and some really tough times, and crossing that finish line for the 2nd time was even MORE victorious for me than the first.

But something was still missing.

As I crossed that finish line at LP Stadium in April of 2011, running 13.1 miles around Music City with 35,000 other runners and even 25,000 more people cheering me on, there was still an emptiness inside me.  One that said I needed more.

I wanted to keep going.

So, here I am, another year later and wondering WHAT IN THE WORLD I have gotten myself into as I endure the long training season for my very first, very long, Chicago Marathon in October.  Hundreds of miles of rough terrain ahead of me.

But instead of wanting to quit, I can’t tell you how excited I am to be a part of this world again.

THIS is what it’s about.  This feeling.  The nerves are there, the adrenaline.  You feel the encouragement from fellow runners.  The high after hitting certain mileage.  How all your conversations usually revolve around which trail, which shoes, which shot block, Gu, or mileage you’re at.

They say it’s a lifestyle, and now I know why...

You see, just like committing to the 1st, and then the 2nd half, I NEVER thought I would ever go to Africa.  I didn’t even think I would ever work for an organization that deals with orphans oversees.  I went to Uganda and Ethiopia last summer and Rwanda this past May.... and like those half marathons, it was hard.  Those trips are tough, insane, brutal and .... Life Changing.

And when I get back.....something is always missing.  Like that 2nd marathon, I know I need more.  

I want to keep going.

And so here I am, committing myself to yet another race to Africa.

My heart is beating.  I’m scared and nervous and anxious and excited and overwhelmed--just like training for a marathon. 

But my heart is beating.

This is what makes me feel alive.  Like pounding foot to pavement in a race, we pound foot to dirt on the mission field.  My heart beats.

I get to visit orphans, telling them how important they are.  That they have a purpose, a destiny.  That they have been forgiven, or that they have a place in this world.  I get to love on them.  And when it’s said and done, it’s probably more therapy to me than them.  And my heart beats.

They say it’s a lifestyle, and now I know why...

Because of this, I wanted to DO something I love FOR something I love.  I’m running this marathon for THEM.  When I cross that finish line, I want to remember that I’m running for a Cause.  There are 163 million orphans in the world.  I’m running for THEM.

I’m asking you today, to remember every race, triathlon, or competition you’ve ever run, any award you’ve ever won.  That feeling you get crossing the tape.  The excitement you feel with each accomplishment.  The overwhelming joy you receive as each step gets you closer and closer to the end.

That’s how I feel when I get to visit these children, and I’m asking for your help in getting me there.

We have opportunities for individuals to sponsor a lot, or a little.  Anything will help.  Any contribution will get me closer to that finish line...

**There are many ways to sponsor if you’re able.  The easiest, and I like to think, most convenient way is to go to our DONATE page on the website.

VISITING ORPHANS: DONATE HERE

FUND CATEGORY:

 -Drop the menu to CHICAGO MARATHON

*Amount to Donate

*Repeating Donation (you can click NO)

PREFERENCE THE DONATION TOWARD SPECIFIC TEAM MEMBER

 -Click Team Member or ministry and type my name, AMANDA HERDINA in the box

And there ya have it.  You will be well on your way to helping change and inspire an orphan’s life forever.  You’ve already inspired mine....

Run ‘til the end,

Amanda Herdina

www.visitingorphans.org

Skydiving... I suppose

I suppose sometimes... like, Skydiving.. You fly up and up and up and up, wondering if the climb will ever end. You sit, and you wait until you're just at the right height. You wait. and you wait, climbing higher and higher. Thoughts, emotions, feelings -- everything comes rushing to you. Faster and faster. Questions, hesitations, regrets...as you reach closer to 12,000 feet. 14,000 feet.

And then, just at the right moment, just when your panic in your mind is so thick you think you can't go any further....the plane levels out and you know you have to inch your way to the edge of the plane. Inching. Slowly. Petrified. Terrified. Every hesitation in your body rushing through your blood sending panic waves to your brain.

"STOP!"

... and then you jump.

You jump. You jump 14,000 feet high in the air out of a perfectly safe and comfortable plane. A plane that was on its way home to land. Safely on the ground.

and yet.. You jump.

You can't see the ground. You jump into a wide open sky, blanketed by clouds making it impossible to see anything around you. The ground doesn't exist at this moment and you have nothing holding you back. Nothing holding you up, nothing holding you down. You are completely free. You catch your breath just in time for your guide to release the parachute....

and you start descending.

You slowly glide your way through the air. Peacefully. Gracefully. Like the little Charlotte babies on Charlotte's Web, you gently sway in the breeze as gravity holds your hand until you get closer to the ground. Silence around you. The serene world around you, comforting every nerve to its most restful state. Descending slowly between the horizons from the sky to the beautiful fields below...

Peace. Tranquility....

and that fear? That crippling, debilitating fear of the jump? That choking terror that almost kept you from experiencing the fall -- it didn't even come close to comparing to the emotions you felt gliding through the air.

That fear? It almost had you. It almost robbed you of one of the most exhilarating experiences of your life. It almost won.

Almost.

I suppose... like Skydiving--so are moments in life. So is starting of on a journey where 85% of the people you talk to are going to think you're crazy.

You walk through life, constantly feeling the climb. The when? The how? Are we ever going to reach the top. Emotions raging, crippling and handicapping fears taking the breath out of you to live the life you were intended. Fears wanting to keep you in your comfort zone, where you're safe. Questions arise. Insecurities take over. Accusations and contending inquiries being thrown your way as you try to just keep climbing.

You start to question yourself.

You wonder what made you think to do something in the first place, and there are tendencies to believe those that think you're crazy. That you'll never do it.

...

And then. In one swift moment, your life comes to that point where you either Jump or Don't. Staying in the comfort zone of the plane of life, knowing where you're going, or knowing where you'll land and when and how. Finding your safety in the recognizable patterns you've grown accustomed to.

Or?

Jumping into the complete unknown. Swallowing everything you've ever known and diving straight into the open air around you. You don't know where you are. You don't know where you're going or how or when. And yet, when you do, there's a gentle peace that takes over your entire being. It's not up to you anymore and you can't be in control..... It's taking one big breath and trusting all your everything in the hands of someone else.

I suppose, like Skydiving... there are moments in life when you have to make a choice.

 

You either Do. or you Don't.

Perfectly Divided

I just spent a week back home in Minnesota, in Lake country.  Up north.  God’s Country is what we’ve called it since I could remember talking…  and so it is.

A week with my parents.  A week with both my brothers, my sister, brother in law, three nephews, 29 cousins, 14 aunts and uncles, and the two that started it all--my 83 and 82 year old Grandparents.

55 Herdina’s in one place.

and we all survived.

How is it that since I was born, and far beyond, we’ve always had this crazy, insane, funny, adventurous, fun family dynamic … and everyone gets along?

Sure, we battle through bruises and fling over tables and jump over each other when we play peaceful games like, Spoons.

We dump each other when going tubing, skiing, jetskiing, knee boarding… and canoeing.

And then there are times when we decide that taking the canoe up a 50 foot vertical sandhill and putting an 11 year old in the drivers seat as it bobsleds down the cascading sand into the frigid water below is a good idea.

We find solace and great conversation on the beaches.

Sometimes, all we do is eat…. in fact, most times, all we’re doing is eating…

We like to read.  Or at least, have our book in our hand so it looks like we read.

We want to take pictures of the Big Catch but get hollered at to get the Net instead!  And then get hollered at when we didn’t get a picture of the big catch.

We’re human jungle gyms.

There’s enough grandchildren to watch the great grandchildren so the children and their children can go for a nice ‘big kid’ night out.

We learn our heritage, and we learn our language.  And we learn what a real Bohemian is and much to our surprise "Hopah" is not, in fact, an American word.

We have 'sweephovahs'

People’s teeth fall out, and it’s okay because everyone in the family’s teeth have fallen out.. either by nature’s course or because they crash the JetSki.

We laugh.  We cry.  We cry because we laugh.

And it’s in moments and memories like these I truly find it hard to be in so many places.  

My home is in Nashville.

My heart is in Africa.

My family is in Minnesota.

I’m so happy in my home, while I’m always missing my heart, and yet am truly myself with my family.

How can I be in three places at once?

How can the heart be so divided … so equally?

And how do you find comfort in missing two places, when you’re finding comfort in living in one?

My heart is perfectly divided.

and one day… I will find a way to be in three places at once.