Dust off the Blog Machine… I’m back.

 

Yes, I know… I know.  It’s been awhile.  There is no excuse, just merely the fact that I let this thing called LIFE get in the way.  And that’s exactly the problem… Or is it?

There’s something special about posting now though, and looking back on how I’ve just let “life” get in the way these past few years…

October 21st, 2010, I pulled into Nashville, Tennessee--officially calling the South “Home.”  And although any true Southerner would say I still have a long way to go, I’m happy where I am with my “ya’lls”, Sweet Tea cravings, and yes--hollerin’ Roll Tide every now and again! … *GASP*

What a year it’s been.

And there definitely was a moment when I wasn’t all so positive, giddy and saw the world through a glittery purple window.  No, I didn’t sing Disney songs every day and smiles were hard to come by.  And while, I know... That's hard to believe, Most of you know my story.  Most have heard me grumble and giggle at the same time about how I’ve come to where I’ve come.  And most of you know how these past couple years have been a true testament to how I’ve just Let Go and Let God…and how I have let Life get in the way.

Mainly.

Or at least I've tried.

Okay, I really struggled with my "letting GO" part of life, but that's what I'm working on.  And I think it's important to admit it.  But what I can attest to is that once I DID finally just LET GOD, it all--everything--started happening so fast.

I remember vividly sitting on my couch one afternoon in November, just aggravated.  Aggravated with how much time I 'wasted', aggravated with the choices I made and mistakes I had to endure.  Aggravated I wasn't further along in my 'journey of success'.  I remember that day so vividly because it was that day I made a choice.  A choice to Jump.

I jumped.  I jumped far into unchartered waters, undiscovered territory.  I jumped to a place I had never been before that day -- I jumped to a place of the unknown.  And that was complete, and utter Faith.

It was so clear to me that I was not going to make it out alive if a part of me didn't die inside.

So I Let Go.  And Let God.

I remember putting pen to paper and 'doing away' with that year.  I said, "I'm done with you, bring on another"  I wrote everything down I saw myself doing and goals I could see reaching in the year to come.  And I began to pray.

I remember praying to God how hesitant I was of giving up the fight and letting Him take over---as if he was going to 'mess it all up for me' or something.  I remember praying, reminding Him that my desires were perfectly drafted out, in ink, for him to read--should he ever need to brush up on what "I" wanted in life, or in case he forgot.  I remember asking Him to be gentle in how he chose to use me because I was still new, and very much raw, to that whole world of, ....Trust...... and I prayed for my stresses to ease, my anxiety to leave, and my life to begin.

And begin it did.

And now here I sit, a little more than a year ago today I wrote that 'letter' to God.  And although looking back it may seem a little silly, God didn't think so.

To this day, God granted every one of those things on that list.  I didn't even KNOW about Africa, but I weirdly added #3. Go to Africa on the list..... And not only did I GO to Africa... I work for an organization where I can go to Africa all the time!  (*sidenote: sorta)  I wanted a dog.  And although the two I'm temporarily living with aren't MY dogs per-say, I have two dogs.  I mean, some of the stuff was pretty petty, but some of it was pretty intense.  All I know is GOD HEARD ME.

But I can confidently say, that without a doubt--if I still carried that control around with me, I would probably not have gotten through the first thing on that list.  I would not be where I am today.  I would not have the people in my life that I have.  I would not have the amazing amazing, life-altering challenges and obstacles that come my way, shaping and molding me into a stronger and better person.  I would not have experienced the pure JOY that I've experienced.  I would not be me today.

But I had to Let Go.  And I had to Let God do His job....  and I had to stop doing what I thought was mine.

Most people will say that letting life ‘get in the way’ is a bad thing.  It reflects a loss of control.  It sets you up for failure.  It shows a ‘wishy washy’ side to you………

I disagree.

If we didn’t let go every day, letting life take its course, we’d miss out on SO MUCH.  We’d miss those breathtaking early morning sunrises.  We’d miss the vibrant shades of red on the trees in the fall.  We’d miss on opportunities to travel to see places and people we don’t normally see.  A friend’s broken heart being mended.  Peacefulness after an intense storm.  A sweet child’s laugh at the Walmart.  Rainbows after a heavy rain.  The deepest, bellowing laugh from your friends over a glass of wine.  Waterfalls.  Massive trees.  Mountaintops.  Music.  We’d miss being completely and radically changed after being broken down.  We’d miss on the opportunity to then rise above…..

We’d miss out on SO MUCH.

So basically, I guess what it all comes down to is that we NEED to let Life GET IN THE WAY.  Like jumping out of an airplane, (which Yes--I conquered), we have to let our Faith take over that we’ll land just fine.  We have to believe life’s gonna grant us miracles.  God loves coming in and being the Host in our lives.  He loves being able to entertain our desires and fill our needs.  But We need to just throw our hands up and know Who’s in control.  We need to LET HIM COME IN.

The words my most precious and dearest Grandma Betty said to me when I was a child still play on repeat in my head.  We need to just, “Let Go and Let God.”


Looking Back, “A Year in Review”

 

 

 
 

 

 

Ethiopia -- COFFEEHOUSE EDITION

AUTHOR’s NOTE:  “I will not be leaving my day job with Visiting Orphans to pursue any sort of Poetry or Songwriting profession.  And there are a lot of words in the English language that don’t have rhyming partners--Sad.”   So anyway, here ya go:


Enjoy ETHIOPIA -- COFFEEHOUSE EDITION:

From Uganda to Ethiopia, two countries divided.

But our mission the same, to Man Up, united.

One thing I learned in my travels to Addis

One piece of advice, I’ll share and that is:

If you're not strong in line,

you won't catch your plane on time.

What Hotel sends their staff and help to greet?

Piling luggage in the rain, 5 vans deep.

Never had hotel staff so nice,

they even did our laundry--TWICE!

Your leader may trick you about EGH,

but really, your accommodations, you’ve got it made.

Yet Korah. Never could you prepare,

for all that you would see there.

The poverty, the hunger, affliction, and pain

You’re broken and your life won't be the same.

Yet, their faith is unmatched,

their love is unending.

The smiles in their eyes,

it's our spirit that needs mending.

Great Hope, such a small, tin roof church

Kids of the Kingdom--yet you're on the Perch

Dirt on the floor and tarp for the walls,

but worship like no other, to their knees they fall.

My eyes couldn't handle 6 preparations of sheep,

but my heart was content as 300 would eat.

Holy Spirit led worship in a small mud room,

Lives were changed, not a moment too soon.

Spackle, and plaster, paint and floors too

Extreme Home Makeover--in Korah, who knew?

A lepers hand was touched,

A lepers mouth was fed.

Yet my soul was the one,

That was replenished instead.

The brothers took us bowling to raise our team spirit

Hit a Pin?  Hah. No. My ball wouldn’t go near it.

Without our late-comer,

Our trip wasn't the same

He sang, he joked,

Silly was his name.

So thankful for Jeff on the Man Up team

Impromptu worship, yeah---his dream.

Visiting Alert brought fear right to the heart,

Yet seeing lepers weave yarn, new lives they could start.

You can have your Starbucks or Dunkin, even homemade brew,

No thanks, I'll take my 'Joe the way Ethiopians do.

A two hour ceremony from beans to pour

Popcorn and coffee, is there anything more?

Korah, a city of love, with a deep dark secret,

But now we must choose to decide if we keep it.

We experienced the dump with our own two eyes

Felt what they lived, hidden beneath the lies

No animal, enemy, least of these should live

the way these children, these Angels, did.

Scrounging for food, swimming in soil.

Sloshing through garbage, living even Hell's worst turmoil

Yet with one small reminder from Heaven above,

God showed up in a rainbow, proving His love.

Reassurances from strangers, and hugs from a friend,

Prayers went up, Lord heal our hearts yet again.

Awareness was spread by Cory and Coby Cotton,

Korah.  The land of the lost, but never forgotten.

Who would have thought that outside city gates,

a 5 hour road trip is all it would take.

Our hope was restored and our faith refreshed,

At the village of Chuko, WE were blessed.

They waited for hours and Well’Comed us loud

The jacket, the Hat --Rob stood so proud.

The Pirates digging a well for clean water to drink

Much we take for granted when we walk to the sink.

What an eye opening experience and straight to the heart

A celebration of the village, we got to take part.

We piled in our Cruisers, but our driver didn’t learn,

Quarter tank of gas, pitch black, and a wrong turn.

An unplanned tour through the jungle at night,

what a RELIEF to us all when we saw their tail light.

An amazing meal at Resort King Fisher,

Even the monkeys would stop and pose for their picture.

Baby orphanages were hard to see them all there,

My heart broke so much, just not enough care.

We held them and fed them and loved them some more,

The need is so great, impossible to ignore.

So back to Addis with our Guides so fun,

Ranger Claw to that, and Get ‘er Done!

The bug ravaged through from altitude, food, or thirst

But a Man Upper doesn’t quit, even at his worst.

We finished our trip with a traditional meal,

Injera, live music, fake weddings--for real!

Mama Shan busted moves no one had seen

Put their dancers to shame, livin’ the dream.

Americans style seems so late,

Ethiopian trendsetters, more than great.

Ethiopian culture, never a bore,

Kaldis, the style, and the marketplace store.

But what we take with us is more than all that,

What we witnessed and saw, just what we take back.

Yet, how could we leave with such heavy hearts

I know we must go now, and do our part.

So Africa is with me, my heart is left there

Bringing love to the orphans, not forgotten--We Care.

Everyone must Go. Must Be. and Love,

Being the hands and feet of Christ Above.

When one window closes, God opens a Door.

James One Twenty Seven.  Need I say more?

*  *  *

a little pictorial to reference...

 Kids of the Kingdom

 Precious women of Mission Ethiopia

 Our Coffee Ceremony at Mulu and Mercy's newly redone house!

 Learnin all about life, havin lunch with the lepers

 Korah:  The Trash Dump

 Our Jungle Safari

 Captain Rob being honored by the Village of Chuko

 the Pirates Dig a Well team

 where the village HAD been getting their water

 Get Er Done.  Gig'em Aggies?  ranger Claw?

 Our EGH Guides!



Crushed Grapes… and I don’t mean the SodaPop

Too many times, we go through life saying, “Pick Me, Pick Me, I’m ready!!”…. but only when and how it’s convenient for us.  We need to be broken first.  We need to be crushed.  We object to the way God wants to use us.  We object to the people He puts in front of us.  We object, we object, we object…. But if we’re truly to serve as He intends, we need to be open to HOW as well.


My words that got me today, I hope they inspire you...

THE COMMISSION OF THE CALL by Oswald Chambers "Who now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up that which is behind of the afflictions of Christ in my flesh for His body's sake." Colossians 1:24 We make calls out of our own spiritual consecration, but when we get right with God He brushes all these aside, and rivets us with a pain that is terrific to one thing we never dreamed of, and for one radiant flashing moment we see what He is after, and we say - "Here am I, send me." This call has nothing to do with personal sanctification, but with being made broken bread and poured-out wine. God can never make us wine if we object to the fingers He uses to crush us with. If God would only use His own fingers, and make me broken bread and poured-out wine in a special way! But when He uses someone whom we dislike, or some set of circumstances to which we said we would never submit, and makes those the crushers, we object. We must never choose the scene of our own martyrdom. If ever we are going to be made into wine, we will have to be crushed; you cannot drink grapes. Grapes become wine only when they have been squeezed. I wonder what kind of finger and thumb God has been using to squeeze you, and you have been like a marble and escaped? You are not ripe yet, and if God had squeezed you, the wine would have been remarkably bitter. To be a sacramental personality means that the elements of the natural life are presenced by God as they are broken providentially in His service. We have to be adjusted into God before we can be broken bread in His hands. Keep right with God and let Him do what He likes, and you will find that He is producing the kind of bread and wine that will benefit His other children.

Top 40 Hits, Uganda Edition

A month.  4 weeks.  31 days.  7 hours,  44,630 minutes.  A month.

Yes, even MORE than a month has gone by since I landed back in the states from my trip to Uganda and Ethiopia.  And I gotta be honest, I thought I'd be muuuuch better at this whole blogging thing.  Wow, I really haven't been.  And looking back, I realized, I hadn't really 'went there' with my whole trip.  So, with a deep sigh and an extremely heavy heart, I’d like to take a minute to actually ‘introduce’ my trip to you….. Let’s see where this goes.

As God Sees It....

What’s it like to go on a Short Term mission trip when you’ve never been on one before?  Well?  For starters, you have nothing to compare it to, so you shouldn’t have any expectations.  Ha.  And if you do, be prepared to have your world rocked, and your expectations blown right out the window.  And know that the second you get home, your life will never, Ever, be the same.  And know that you’ll be okay with that.

You have every right to feel nervous, anxious, scared, excited, insecure, inadequate, unprepared, ---any emotion you might have felt entering the doors your first day of Junior High and you had a giant pimple on your head---you probably feel the same way.

I was really nervous how my extreme motion claustrophobia (yes, self-diagnosed---don’t try and go get a prescription) would handle the 13 hour flight over.  But MUCH to my surprise and HUGE relief, it actually went really fast.  I think the excitement outweighed the extreme claustrophobia and exhaustion, thankfully.  We finally landed in Entebbe and boarded our caravan to Kampala, Uganda.  A huge 30 psgr bus, an 8 psgr van, and a huge truck full of 37 x 4 bags of luggage!  It’s not your typical airport pickup.  And It’s one thing to jump on board a bus, with a local driver, for 3 hours with total strangers in a completely foreign country……. And it’s completely a different thing to have all that AND the Man Up Experience, Cheetah Bus Style:

(Why our Men GO):

Okay, okay, there’s no way I’ll get through this 14 days of absolutely amazingness without losing you.  Or better yet, I might keep you, but my computer will be so outdated by the time i finish rambling that I won't be able to post this anyway.  So, here's what we're gonna do.  We’re breaking this trip down, the edited, commercial version, Cheetah Bus Bullet Point style…..

Top 40 Hits of Uganda

1. Hundreds of footballs and soccer balls don’t travel well--but suck it up.  It's ALL worth it in the end

2. Carrying thousands of dollars cash into a foreign country is as scary as it seems.

3. No matter how organized and prepared you think you are with thousands of donations, you never will be

4. Don’t expect hot water.  That way when it comes, it’s really hot.  And I mean REALLY hot.

.And screams can be heard for miles in Africa.

5. Wedge cut looking fries, are in fact, not wedge cut fries.

6. Electricity’s nice….but working flashlights are priceless

7. Collapsing mosquito nets don’t always wake you up innocently

8. 4am. There are other cultures in the world, yes.  And not necessarily quiet ones.

9. Bu•tter •nug:  (buh’tƏr’nũg) n  1. sweet, small child of African descent—typically Ugandan.  2. Delightful, lovable, and charming.  3. Full of adoration, and usually possessing big, round and hopeful eyes.  4. Seeking and worthy of attention and love.  Well known for their sweet hugs and captivating smiles.  (Man Upper International Dictionary, 3^rd edition)**

10.Ugandan girls and boys know how to Hula.  American white men ….well, try.

11. Face Paint + Brushes + Pure Chaos = Entertainment for hours… and not a clean cell of skin anywhere

12. Uganda is not where the Lion King was filmed…. But it might be referenced in the Garden of Eden.

13. CHARGE those kids.  And then Charge them some more.

14. Simple service, like a food line, will bless someone for days

15. Get familiar with the name Mama Kiki—she’s a legend in Africa

16. 37 adults CAN entertain themselves, as long as Pterodactyls are involved

17. Child prisoners?  Don’t exist.  God’s angels do.  And they will teach YOU how to worship

18. 26 men can actually hold their own, for 4 hours, on a mountainside, 5,000 feet up, playing soccer with the best of them.  And one girl can do the same.

19. Don’t leave your quarters without gum and stickers

20. When all else fails---DANCE

21. A screaming  and singing welcome from 200 children bombarding your caravan will NEVER be replaced

And the three that pick you, well NEVER be forgotten…and you will NEVER be the same

22. A true Man Upper* celebrates his birthday sourcin’ the Nile

23. Always take your meds with food.  ALWAYS.

24. Squeaking in the ceiling—cheese and peanut butter won’t always fix. 

25. Jungle juice will prove itself worthy time and time again.  And much to your team’s dismay, you will be bite free

26. Despite what they may tell you in America, hearing a Man Up team ‘working out’ outside your window at 6am IS actually comical

27. Mini sunglasses are always a hit.  Always

28. Watching a child perform his heart out will leave a heavy footprint on your heart—and you will have never felt so proud

29. Popcorn in the morning—‘nuff said.

30. Dude Perfect is really good at basketball.  Well, shooting baskets anyway—really far away.  atop water towers.

31. Seatbelts are for wimps.  Carpeted window guards are for Geniuses.

32. Children care who you are, where you’re from, how old you are, what your favorite food is, what your favorite sport is, and if you’re married or not—and will sit for hours to prove they care

And they can, AND WILL, call out your age just by taking off your hat

33. Just because a motorcycle is in the river doesn’t mean it’s stuck

34. You would be mayor if you carried soccer balls and threw them out your bus window every day

35. Go Longhorns!  …. Or don’t.

36. A child’s simple prayer request will leave you humbled forever

37. Do NOT tell a Man Upper* he can’t do something.

38. Apes, or chimpanzees, can run fast.  ….but not necessarily in Africa.

39. When all else fails---DANCE AGAIN.

40. A tearful goodbye will stain your heart and break you.  No matter who you are.

*Man Upper: a father, son, brother…who leaves the comfort of the norm, addresses the need to GO, then VISITS, and advocates for the fatherless.  Huggin on, loving, on, and reassuring the ‘fatherless’ that they are not, in fact, Fatherless.

A litte Pictorial to Reference the above ....

 The ever amazing team from Return Ministries packing up all our 150 bags of luggage!

 They picked me....and I was never, ever again the same!  "Amandaaa, Amandaaaa...."

 Dude Perfect making their awesome shot at Canaan Children's Home!

 Don't tell them you're on a schedule!

 Yes, we visit the Nile on a Mission Trip!  HEY!  Moses did....

 All our amazing Men, the official Inductors of MAN UP!

 BUTTERNUGS.  Need I say more?

 STUNNA SHADES!

 Captain Rog throwing out some soccer balls to the local kids!

 Mama Kiki!

 I wouldn't say I DIDN'T feel safe....  :/

 When your coach says CHARGE, you CHARGE.  And you leave your heart on the field....

 Each grade, boys and girls, performed a program for us visitors!  What talented children!!!

 There seriously was not one more place I could paint on these kids!  They started painting their clothes....  Oops.

 Leave all your hesistations and reservations at home... there is no such thing as fear

 Showin us how it's done!

 There is no I in team..... .

 The Sprinkler.  Duh...

only a Man Up thing!

So, there ya have it.  I tried.  Thank you for your light hearts.  As I still seem to struggle with putting the trip into words, I think it might be best to just visit you all personally so I can talk about each ministry individually, specifically. My written words just don't do them justice.

 So, I guess in the meantime…stayed tuned until Ethiopia gets broken down—Coffeehouse Style.

XOXO,

Amanda